Yesterday was a new moon, which is a time to set intentions for the following month. Inspired by a conversation with my dad the other day (hi, Dad!), I decided that my intention for this month is to get my head wrapped around a retirement plan.
I’m a sprightly 32, so aside from monthly contributions to my 401k I haven’t bothered much about how I am going to support myself when the wheels start to fall off.
And now I know why.
This shit is scary.
For the past two days I have swung between patting myself on the back for having a good start on retirement planning and freaking the hell out because I had no idea how overwhelming some of this stuff is. And I have NO IDEA if I am doing it right.
You would think that as a (somewhat) reasonable (kind of) adult my first instinct would be to talk to a professional about this. Someone who can give me clear financial guidance (and maybe hold my hand while I freak out a little). Nope. The course of action I am most leaning toward is gathering up all of my papers, shoving them into the first folder I find and forgetting all about this nonsense for another 10 years or so.
Option number two is hunting down and marrying George Clooney now that he is back on the market.
Since both of those options will most likely end with major disappointment, I think my new policy for tackling this retirement thing is that no planning, phone calls, emails, or other work will be done without a giant glass of wine. And it will be good wine.
And Dad, I am sending you the bill for the wine since this was all your idea in the first place.
Hey! I am starting to feel better already!